Category Archives: Addictions and addicts

We Need God, Always

We often fumble through life turning to God in times of what we think is need. We actually need God at all times. He gives us every breath. We have a tendency, at least at times, to think we can do life on our own. We go along pretty well until a crisis hits and then we pray.

God will walk beside us waiting for that opportunity to commune but He wants us to commune with Him at all times. Those times that we think we are alone and doing life fairly well or even extremely well, God is still walking beside us waiting for us to realize His presence or waiting for us to realize our need.

We get busy and don’t take time to thank God or even realize He is the one giving us each breath. Apologize for those moments that you are so consumed with life that we don’t realize who gives us life. Be still today to feel God’s presence and thank Him for being there at all times.

A Hug From Your Heavenly Father

There are times in our lives that we would feel so much better to have a loved one, a parent, a mother or father, a grandparent or anyone to reach out and touch us and let us know we are loved.

There are times in our lives that there may not be a physical person available to do that.

 There are children that grow up not knowing what it is to be loved. For many reasons, they may not have had parents or someone to hug them when they needed a hug. Broken homes and parents not being there for their child is a tragedy in that life. There are many living irresponsibly that bring about this lack of love to a child’s life. Selfish actions so often cause hurts to all that are involved.

 There are times as we grow that people don’t really know how to understand us so they don’t know what we really need. Teenagers often are torn between independence and a need for love and aren’t understood. Even loving parents want to continue telling them how to do life when that is no longer what they need. They need respect as they enter this new stage of life. Other people have had experiences that others just don’t understand which can make it difficult to offer the love and understanding that is needed.

 There may be times that our parents are no longer available. Maybe a job has caused us to have to move away. We can still talk to them but have limited time to see and touch. Maybe their life on earth has come to an end. Eventually we all have to experience that loss. Maybe there are things that have happened to cause an emotional distance in the relationship. Situations arise that cause parents and children to distance themselves sometimes out of protection and sometimes out of hostility.

 No matter how much humanly love we lack on earth, we all have a Heavenly Father that can touch us in a way like no human could. He loves us more that any human could and knows exactly what we have gone through. He loves us no matter what our past or present holds. He accepts us right where we are no matter the circumstance. He knows our need better than we do. We can feel His touch but we have to be willing to accept Him as Father and we have to want to receive His touch.

 If you have never felt the love of your Heavenly Father, you can today. Reach out and accept Him. He has already accepted you. He want to embrace you and carry you.

 If you know what this love is, share it with others. You can keep going back for your daily hugs.

Do You Have Habits That Need To Be Changed?

The most important habit you should have is to put God first. If you need to change any habits, that should be the first one to change. That will lay the foundation for all of your other habits. Ask God to reveal what habits to make and what habits to break. He will let you know which ones to work on and He will also help you develop them or quit them. He wants to be involved in every day of your life and in every situation that you face. The life God has planned for you is better than you could plan yourself. Ask God to help you put Him first so you can have the best plan.

What Love For An Addict Should Look Like

To an addict, love is:

  • ·       bailing them out of situations even jail
  • ·       fixing a problem that they created
  •      giving them money
  •           feeding them

This kind of love may help someone that does not have an addiction but it will actually harm those with an addiction. Everyone may need help even if they don’t have an addiction but usually on rare occasions. If needing help is a normal trend, it is time to take another look. The addiction could be, as insignificant as it looks, sitting on the couch too much. Or it could be something that looks more destructive such as alcohol or drug use. Either way, the situation needs to be examined and handled with extreme caution. Anyone contributing to their behavior will cause them to continue with their destructive pattern and stay in their addicted frame of mind.

Love expressed to an addict should:

  • ·        allow them to feel the consequence of their decision
  •        ask them what their solution is to their problem
  •           guide them and encourage them to make better choices
  •       say “No”

This kind of love is tough. No one likes to see their loved ones hurting. It has to be understood that it was their choice that got them in trouble. Without allowing them to hurt and feel the consequence, you will actually be causing them more hurt. They will dig themselves and their enablers deeper into worse situations. Boundaries need to be set to protect yourself and to help the addict come closer to wanting a better life. Love them and encourage them but pray over every situation so that you know what will truly help. We can’t always know what to do but God will guide us to do what He wants and show us what will be best for all involved.

A Manly Thing

 Men have this thing about wanting to fix things, to fix problems whether the problem is theirs or someone else’s,  to do things on their own, to achieve on their own. This is great until things don’t work out so well. When things don’t work out so well, they lose motivation and confidence.

 God wants to be a part of every project and problem that we face. Sometimes it is hard for a man to turn to God for help because they have that in them to handle it on their own. Especially when it involves another human being, the man will have to come to terms with the fact that we cannot change others. God gave them a free will and God does not cross that so what makes us think we will be able to.

 Men that are doing their best to follow God will often do what they can until things get ugly and then they will call on God. God wants to be a part of the project and solution from the beginning. If we invite Him to help from the beginning, we will save ourselves a lot of grieve.

 When men face issues that cause them to feel like failures like a child not turning out like they expected, a failed marriage, not being able to find work or maybe a job that isn’t meeting the needs for his family like he would like, etc., they may often get discouraged and lose motivation. This is a great time to be walking with God because He can remind us of who we are in Christ. We may be trying to solve an issue that involves another human being and we may need to come to terms that it is not going to happen. Maybe it is just a matter of letting go and letting God. Sometimes when we do that it allows God to work. It will be out of obedience and admitting that It can’t be done without God that the answer will come.

Sometimes the answer that we want does not come. That is when we have to decide if we are going to let it destroy us or allow God to work in it and use it to bring Him glory. This is not about us. This is about God. We are but a speck of dust that only exists for a second compared to eternity that God loves and will work to our betterment through everything that we go through but we have to let Him work. It will all come to completion and we will find joy again but it takes that step of letting God do what God wants to do it the situation. The end will be better in the long run. What good does it do to get down on ourselves and feel sorry for ourselves? We must move ahead and continue to follow in the steps that God leads us. It is not what crosses our path that matters. It is what we do with it that matters and what we allow it to do to us. Don’t be defeated. Give it to God and move ahead.